If you read my blog post yesterday, you should it’s about a great guy and it’s right below, then you know I had someone I know pass away. He wasn’t someone I hung out with regularly or even saw that often, but worked with him for quite some time. This passing has definitely put me into a weird funk. My sleep pattern has always been irregular and weird. But the past 2 nights have been tough, with waking up every few hours, not even from nightmares but just waking up. I have this weird thing about me where when I lie in bed is when my mind wanders and thinks a lot. I actually attribute it to the dark. When it is dark then my mind goes into hyperdrive. I guess that’s why movies like Blair Witch freaked me out. It let my mind go crazy and scare the crap out of myself.
I tend to freak myself out about things like death especially when I am about to sleep. I have this innate ability to not be able to get something out of my mind. Like when someone tells me to clear my mind and make it blank. I can do it for about a second, then my mind wanders. I think about a bare white room with nothing in it. Then I would think about the corners of the room and where the door would be and a single dot on the wall and where it came from. Then I would try and figure out the dot and its origin and that would take me outside the room. Yes I know very ADHD, but I don’t think I am to bad. Although I do daydream and catch myself sometimes in the middle of the day just randomly thinking about something.
Continue reading →
Posted in: aaron, my life, thoughts.
Tagged: better · down · gloomy · slowly · therapy
So as I arrived home on December 1st I missed a few phone calls due to not hearing it in my pocket while driving home. I looked at my phone and just as I was about to call back, I got a text informing me that someone I worked with had passed away. I was stunned, literally shook beyond what I ever expected. With the digital age, text messages came in, facebook updates and twitter updates. I looked online and to my horror the news was there, a male motorcycle rider passes away due to accident in Folsom.
Larry Schumacher was a Best Buy Car Installer. I worked with Larry for over 2 years while at the store. We butted heads a lot, which is what happens when you’re a manager trying to manage overtime and work of installers. Anyone working with installers know that line of give and take there. But one thing of all those times we didn’t see eye to eye never did we have a unprofessional conversation or animosity between eachother. Larry was good at this job and did what he thought was best to try and be the best. I knew that and respected that. He knew the same about me as well. So regardless of not agreeing on many things at work, we got along well with so many other things. After I left the company and stopped by for their inventory, Larry and I had a good conversation. He was wondering what my plans were and wished me luck and thanked me for helping him when I was there. I did the same and sadly that was my last interaction with him.
It is amazing how a passing can awaken you and disturb you to your very soul. If you worked for Best Buy you know that it is like a small High School, plenty of gossip and drama, but what makes it different is that people generally like eachother and consider one another family. We are used to spend more time at work then with our family, so it’s natural to gravitate towards your work friends. Also working with the company for so long in so many stores in the area, its amazing how far a passing reaches. It is one of those things that upset you, but the also makes you proud how the group pulls together in a time of mourning.
The best thing is that nobody has tarnished his image or said negative about him riding. My .02 about that is if you ride just be safe and smart. You know better then I do on what that is, but just for the fact that this year alone I know of 3 people that perished from riding a bike has made it official that I will never be riding.
You will be missed Larry. You were a great co-worker. A great installer. A great friend. A great person. You made others lives better and know that so many people will be missing your presence. Rest in peace.
Posted in: aaron, friends, thoughts.
Tagged: co-worker · larry schumacher · passing · rip
Ok let me get this out first and foremost, I am not a parent nor do I know how it feels to have a little babies life in my hands. I of course want to have that feeling one day but hopefully not soon. With that disclaimer out I think the world is almost made up of people that just aren’t ready to take care of a child. I know there is nothing to prepare you for it. It’s sorta like sports though. As much as you practice nothing can prepare you for the real thing, but it does help you to a extent and makes sure you are better off then you were originally. It really does crack me up on how sheltered and unforgiving some kids are. I mean I feel really old saying this because our parents said it, but you have to be able to grow up and feel pain. We all survived right? That doesn’t mean let your kids cross the street without teaching them to look both ways and what stop signs and lights are. But it also means its okay to let them ride a bike without being padded up like they were about to jumped by a attack dog.
The reason for this rant is that I went to get a haircut yesterday. While there a mother came in with two kids, on leashes. The funny thing is that the leashes were like 2 ft long. When she sat the kids went different directions grabbing magazines and hair product. But does she scold them or heaven forbid spank them? Of course not, it’s the “no stop doing that”, “I’m going to count to 10″, blah blah blah. Seriously though I am not saying you should beat a kid, but a spanking to the backside never was abuse. I mean I would not have imagined ever going to the toy store and crying on the dirty floor until I got what I wanted. I just knew that it was wrong and if I did something done, I would get punished in one way or another.
Parent’s let your kids be kids and grow up. We all get bumps and bruises along the way. It all adds to the story of our life. The scab on my knee or the stitches on my arm. Actually I somehow made it through childhood without any broken parts or casts. But I had my share of sliding on gravel bloodying myself up. Its a fact that when you suppress something, the chances that when it comes out will be larger is enormous. Let kids grow up well and don’t hold them back. Kid’s are smarter then when we were the same age, so just trust them as crazy as it is.
This will all change if i ever have a daughter by the way and everything written above is null and void :-p
Posted in: aaron, rant.
Tagged: dumb parents · parenthood · random
